Anxiety Says You Can’t Relax: Learn How to Relax with Somatic Therapy
Anxiety can make it feel like you can't relax, ever. Somatic therapy can help you learn how to relax by building your capacity for positive experiences. Many people who struggle to relax also deal with related feelings of fatigue, overwhelm, and anxiety. Physically, it can feel like your engine is always revving, whether you notice it most in your body or your mind. It can contribute to conditions like general anxiety, panic disorder, health anxiety, and OCD if left unchecked.
Why Anxiety Feels Like You Can't Relax
Chronic anxiety can make it feel like, even when you have the opportunity, you still can't relax. You may find yourself googling "how to relax" in hopes that there is a magic skill out there that you somehow just didn't come by naturally. This symptom of anxiety can be really frustrating for you and those around you when you can't relax, because it can make it difficult to enjoy life even when things are going well.
You may notice this feeling of "I can't relax" pops up the most when you are having experiences that might otherwise offer you the ability to feel happiness, joy, or connection. Instead, there is a sense that "if things are good, then the other shoe is bound to drop". Good feelings end up bringing on the sense that something bad is about to happen, that you're about to be caught off guard by something awful. Once this pattern develops, feelings of joy, happiness, and connection often trigger sudden feelings of fear or sadness.
You might recognize experience of feeling like you can't relax as having thoughts of what could go wrong or worrying about “what ifs”. You might have thoughts of losing things or people you hold dear or fast forward in time to missing out on experiences that are precious to you. This type of emotional patterning is very common for people with general anxiety and what's at the root of it is often trauma.
How Can Somatic Therapy Help Me Learn How to Relax
In somatic therapy, we use body sensations, movement, and other techniques to help you build your capacity to handle different feelings and experiences - like growing your capacity to handle feelings of joy or relaxation, when you feel like you can't relax. The somatic therapy technique described here includes swinging your attention between a pleasant focal point (something that will trigger feelings of joy or happiness or pride) and a neutral focal point (something you don't have many feelings or associations about, at all). The somatic therapy practice of alternating your attention can help you to build tolerance for feelings that might otherwise feel overwhelming. This exercise can help you learn how to relax by growing your ability to tolerate the feelings and thoughts that show up, without running away from them or reacting to them.
How to Relax Without Forcing Yourself
When you can't relax, you also can't force yourself to relax. Instead, you can learn how to relax by learning to allow it to happen. This somatic therapy exercise is a practice in observing how your body becomes activated and deactivated (how it gears up, and settles down). Growing your ability to observe your body's sensations without reacting to them can help you learn how to relax without trying to "force it."
During this exercise you may notice feelings of relaxing, followed by feelings of tensing up, or thoughts of something bad happening. If you have chronic anxiety and a history of trauma, this pattern is completely normal for you. This process is about learning to slow that sequence down and hold the experience with curiosity, as best you can. Over time, this can help to teach your body how to relax without launching into activation every time this pattern fires off for you. Learning how to relax is a gradual process if you have a history of trauma. Slow and steady.
Can I Do Somatic Therapy On My Own?
Somatic therapy focuses primarily on the body and sensations. For that reason, if you are prone to panic attacks, health anxiety, OCD, or other somatic related symptoms - it is recommended to use somatic techniques with a trained therapist. These somatic therapy exercises are not intended to cure or treat anxiety conditions or other medical conditions. If you feel like you can't relax and would like to learn skills to help you relax, please consult with a mental health professional.
We can help.
If you or someone you love is struggling with anxiety and you feel like you can’t relax, please reach out. We offer Anxiety Treatment including Somatic Therapy in Orlando and online throughout the state of Florida. Call today or send us your info and we’ll reach out for a free consultation to see if one of our Somatic Therapists would be a good fit to help you learn how to relax.
